Common Techniques To Have a Happy Partnered Life

Things couples try in therapy that you can try at home.

Therapy 22nd Sep, 2021

Couples who quarrel on a daily basis are normal. While some may fix their problems on their own, others tend to find comfort under the guidance of a licensed therapist. If you want to receive therapy advice from a professional or you want to know if it is right for you, here you have some of the best techniques and exercises to help you get started. 

Best Couples’ Therapy Techniques and Exercises: 

1. Reflective Listening: 

Reflective listening is a beneficial exercise. Both spouses take turns becoming active listeners. When trying this, always use ‘I’ sentences instead of ‘you’ sentences. This exercise helps you stop blaming your partner and lets you focus more on your feelings and opinions. When couples take turns becoming active listeners, healthy communication, and conflict resolution skills, for couples is promoted. 

2. Emotion Focused Therapy:

Many therapists use a method called Emotion Focused Therapy. This type of therapy aims to identify the pattern of mistakes and wrongdoings in the relationship that could interfere with emotional and relationship bonds. People learn to use this technique as a way to heal, or build better, bonds in relationships. 

3. Narrative Therapy: 

Narrative therapy is all about people describing their problems in a narrative form, expressing their problems as stories. This can help them realise that no single story can summarise their entire experience. There will always be inconsistencies and contradictions. Narrative therapy may be helpful for couples who feel that their relationship has failed because of only two mistakes. These couples usually think that they are exposed to romantic traps and emotional trauma because they failed from the beginning, and this is what they deserve. In reality, conflicts are much deeper than that.

4. The Gottman Method: 

The Gottman method is commonly used among couples’ therapists. This tool is designed to help couples deepen their understanding of each other, while coping with conflicts in their relationship. The Gottman has been used by professionals for over 40 years. 

5. Imago Relationship Therapy: 

Imago Relationship Therapy, developed by Dr. Imago in 1980, emphasises the connection between adult relationships and childhood experiences. Through understanding childhood trauma, the therapy attempts to make couples more sympathetic and understanding of each other. 

6. Solution-Centred Therapy: 

Solution-centred therapy is a model worth considering when you encounter a specific problem or want to work towards a particular goal. This approach is a short-term, goal-oriented, evidence-based treatment that helps couples change, by constructing solutions instead of obsessing over problems.

Best Tips To Make These Methods More Efficient:

  • Be Smarter:

When you encounter problems in your relationship, an overall vision of the situation can help you remember your wishes and goals. Couples become smart by writing down goals and collecting pictures that reflect their relationship desires. This is a tangible reminder that the marriage has begun. Both parties need to work hard to build a strong, healthy, and lasting relationship. 

  • Expressing Gratitude:

Expressing gratitude and communicating what is effective in your relationship can help increase your love for each other. Get in the habit of expressing gratitude every day through private conversations, texts, or calls. 

  • Plan Meaningful Conversations:

Never avoid having an important discussion. A lot can be achieved in these conversations than in hundreds of tiny ones. If you can, set some time aside for a serious conversation. We often have conflicts because the timing is incorrect, and we are not in the mood for thoughtful dialogue. It is better to plan difficult conversations in advance, so that no one will be surprised.

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