What is Sex?
For most, sex is an imperative. We are hardwired to procreate in order to add to the species. Yet, this as an incentive is only a small piece of the complex pie that is sexual behaviour. Sex is also something that creates bonds through shared enjoyment, makes people feel closer, makes someone feel alive or dominant and for some is an extension of love. Sex is also something that we as a society, both historically and currently, attribute value to. As such, sex can be seen by some as a pure commodity, something won by the highest bidder.
There are no hard or fast rules when it comes to sex. Some couples or individuals can be “sexual” in ways that others can not relate to. As humans have evolved so too have accepted definitions of “normal” and “taboo”.Views and opinions on sex have changed and have been coloured by things such as culture, creed and religion and will continue to do so.
Sex is one of the most powerful forces humans possess and something that for most is a necessity but for some, an obsession. Despite its importance though, many find it difficult to talk about due to its deep seeded personal roots. Between couples it is typically one of the highest priorities and compatibility factors.
Arousal and Sex:
Arousal (or being “turned on”) is the body’s response to erotic stimuli. This stimulus may be visual, audible, tactile or based on fantasy. Arousal precedes sex and is the irresistable catalyst toward the ultimate act of intercourse. Arousal can often feel like the body is being taken to a place which is, as arousal heightens, disconnected from the mind.
What we find arousing can often surprise us and is not always with obvious rhyme or reason. For some arousal is quick and easy, for others more complex and easier to lose. Often we can be in positions of arousal when something, (a minor cause of stress) can snap us out and leave us feeling equally frustrated or wondering why we were aroused in the first place.
Attitudes to sex have changed. So too have acceptable arousal stimuli and “normal” sexual behaviour or acts. Activities such as anal play and dominance for example are now considered part of a healthy sex life. It is commonly agreed that variance in a couples sex life is a positive and can help to keep things fun and fresh.