Why Marriage Therapy Is A Good Thing

4 reasons you may need marriage therapy.

Therapy 08th May, 2021

Every couple has disagreements. Many times, it’s a lack of sex life or a pattern of continuous arguing. The coronavirus pandemic has introduced yet another possible stressor: more time spent together at home, which can intensify problems or reveal hidden flaws in a relationship.

Therapy can be beneficial. It’s not about pointing fingers. On the other hand, couples counseling teaches you how to communicate and ask for what you need. Many couples struggle for years before seeking help, but it’s still best to seek help sooner rather than later. Obstacles may be created by unhealthy attitudes and resentful feelings. These are the top reasons why couples seek relationship counseling.

1. You’ve Been Disconnected:

Some couples no longer engage with each other after years of marriage and simply coexist as roommates. Divorce rates rise and fall at various times. At around 7 years, the first wave reaches its pinnacle. After 20 years, the second wave reaches its peak. Couples sometimes forget what brought them together in the first place and why they fell in love in the first place. If you’ve been with someone for a long time, you’ve developed a life narrative, memories, and experience with them that you won’t be able to recreate with someone else. Couples counseling will help you rekindle your passion.

2. You Fight And Argue Over Money:

Money has always been a source of contention for couples. When you add in the additional late-life concerns that baby boomers face, you’ve got a recipe for financial strife. Differing spending styles or disputes about how to plan for and invest in retirement can lead to conflicts. There may be anxiety over not having enough money or disparities in how your retirement savings are handled. Money can elicit strong emotions such as anger, fear, and envy. It has such a solid associational value with power that it can generate an imbalance in the relationship unless the partner who earns less has another source of psychological control. Therapy can help people understand their relationship with money and how it affects their perceptions of themselves and others.

3. Someone Has Cheated:

Attempting to fix an affair is one of the most common explanations for couple’s therapy. According to experts, 15 percent of married women and 25% of married men have had an extramarital affair. Adultery does not always imply physical infidelity. How do you know when you’ve gone too far? Infidelity can mean many different things to different people. What matters is that spouses within their own partnership develop a mutual, agreed-upon concept of fidelity. If you’re on the verge of straying, it’s easier to seek therapy now than to deal with the consequences later. 

If one of the partners has already had an affair, there is a way out. Around a third of married couples survive an affair. Still, they’re usually the ones who seek help and do whatever they can to save their marriage. In reality, an affair is often the catalyst for confronting issues that have been ignored for years.

4. You Have A Lot Of Pointless And Hurtful Arguments:

We all deal with conflict in various ways. When things get hot, some of us thrive on competition, while others retreat. Then others are passive-aggressive. Big fights can leave tears and bruised feelings in their wake, but constant bickering can be just as damaging. Couples can get stuck in a cycle. An argument isn’t a bad thing; it’s how people deal with the disagreement that can make it unhealthy. To put it another way, it’s not so much what you say as it is how you say it.

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